help me, my dearest.......

help me out ,
show me the way.
there is no doubt,
i know right away!

your thoughts chase me
all night and all day!
its as if you can't see,
or just don't care
enough for me?

with your thoughts I go to bed,
you are in all my dreams,
I open my eyes and there i find ,
you!!! running through my mind's films!

You jump in when-
I try to think of the menu,
oh, how will anything be done
if there is nothing but YOU?

Oh, I cant wait anymore,
I can suffer no more!
If I could control the time,
- holding you , i would have stared
at you for some time ,
----And then I would have certainly dared,
MY dearest exam paper, to finish you in time!
Mad

TRANSLATED POST (POEM)

Here is the promised translation of the poem I had posted previously under the title "V -day special".
The original poem is in Marathi , my mother tongue .
This poem is not the exact translation, for it would have been very hard for me to explain the exact meaning of some peculiarities which are a part of Maharashtrian culture.
So, I made some changes, the meaning and the feelings though, are unchanged.
One thing I realised while rewriting my own poem in another language - its not an easy job.
The original one was so spontaneous, I had finished composing it in 20 minutes!
But to rewrite and convey the same message in English took me about 2-3 hours!- I hope its not bad!




Through the boundless sea of endless thoughts,
one or two thoughts came floating above,
they rested upon the shore; these thoughts,
they floated up in my mind.

They brought back the memory ,
of those wonderful days - days of joyful swings,
when we ran through the meadows and danced on the winds,
days when you and me- used to play free of worry!

when you passed high school ,
I was in eighth grade!
- the wonders outside school when you told,
oh how proud I felt,
-didn't understand much of it though!

......then came the day of our first date!
you were waiting eagerly for me,
- boy, you were angry when i was late !
you were red and wouldn't talk to me,
how I adored you! -with your hair i played.
never can i forget how your lips gifted me,
a wonderful smile when the momentary anger faded.

one thought led to another,
and made a beautiful chain altogether....
it pulled me away from the present ,
taking me far away in the past.
and that's when your voice called,
bringing me back to the moment - but for a moment.
for, the next minute i entered your loving embrace,
and started thinking about our future.......

- Mad 23rd feb 2009



p.s. this is a work of fiction, not my own story.

ME,MYSELF , I.........and the glass globe .

The alarm rings alarmingly loud and "I" wake up. "I" sit up on the bed half sleepy - half awake. Then "My" thoughts come back to reality from the great exhausting tour of dreamland. "I" am the sole witness of where all I have been in my dreams! Anywho, now that "I" am conscious "I" feel tired and exhausted from the little sleep I got.... just 8 hours of sleep! How hard "I" worked yesterday..... watched a movie, ate, cooked, washed, read the news....... so much work!- For this great contribution to society , I am not even thanked enough! "My" day is so hard and "I MYSELF " have to take care of soooooo many things .... !!!!!!
MY bus, my work , my sleep , my stuff, my problems........ the list is unending!
I do this , did that, achieved this, am so great, so fantastically brilliantly astonishingly PERFECT !!!!!!!

REALLY? IS IT???
In this very- busy-extremely-competitive-progressing- each-second world , somewhere we become utterly selfish and so much aware about our own problems, that we create an 1 inch thick glass globe around us . This globe is a mini-world which contains things that only concern us! We start existing in a small colony of "my precious " . Each day we trod the same path, take the same bus, see the same people .... because ALL these people also have a similar micro-colony around them!
.....And in the long run we forget to stop and stare! We forget that humans other than inside this small subset exist... just like us, fully aware and with emotions and all....
While running to work or school how many of us actually stop and help some old granny trying to climb the metro stairs with her luggage? How many of us actually get up and offer a seat to the ones who need it? How many of us consider, even for a second, that among the people surrounding us all day, there might be someone who faces problems much larger and graver than compared to our everyday hardships?
I once remember (not being a native Mumbaiite) mistakenly boarding a local that had come from Virar, and was on its way to Churchgate, from Borivli during August, last year. There was a slight drizzle as I boarded the Ladies compartment ......I was holding on to the outer pole and standing on an inch of the local train.... as you can imagine the rest of me hanging out of it..... One of the kind ladies- safely standing in the middle of the compartment shouts "close the door, rain is coming through and our sarees might get wet!" Wah re humanity!!!
- What if I were her daughter? Would the story be the same? I guess not and the reason is "the glass globe"
This fantastic glass globe.......
A: "You know XYZ got a heart- attack! "
ME (To MYSELF) : Good I am not in his place!
ME (aloud): hmmm , thats sad.
Why cant people think out of the glass globe? Why cant people have some compassion for the human kind? The world is progressing and expanding but that doesnt mean we become heartless towards others' problems. Why does this air of ME- ness around us decrease our visiblity like some kind of smog due to incresed pollution? Perhaps our own thoughts have supersaturated the space around us such that no other stimulus from the outside penetrate through to us. And what will more progress bring? Will we turn into mighty Goliaths who crush people under their feet?
In a poem called "Oonchai" , Mr. Vajpai has correctly and nicely concluded ,
"Oh GOD ,lead me not to such heights that make me incapable of embracing near ones , that make me heartless"

Curious thoughts or thoughtful curiosity?

As a kid, I was always very curious about new things, which is very normal for children. And as all normal people grow up, or at least they think they do, I grew up too. (Lets not consider Peter Pan- I still want to meet him!). I thought my curiosity for things will decrease,but that is not happening for the next 100 years! I think about curiosity and always visualise the dog from Dr. Dolittle , he keeps on counting the white lines on the road or the trees passing by - untill his head starts to spin! Most of the time during my road trips (which greatly increase during my vacations in India), I find myself doing the same involuntarily! I mechanically keep a count of huts passing by or trees-one by one, or trucks on the highway. And when I get to sit in the front seat I move my head from left to right to read everything on the backside of the front vehicle. And then when suddenly some stronger stimulus (usually My Dad shouting- coz i paid no attnetion to what he had been trying to say for a fairly long time. How long - I cant say ) around me leads to a mixture of feelings/realisations in chronological order, eyes rotating- headspinning- awareness-looking around -coming back to reality-too boring- eyes rotating -headspinning- you lost me again! - again I start gazing outside hoping to find something new among the same huts, forests, trees or trucks on the highway!
A few days back, a new thought of reading "ALICE IN WONDERLAND" entered my mind. And as I read the book- I concluded that Alice actually had a more bizzare and haphazard way of thinking than I did! This conclusion was a result of two realisations - somebody with a more eccentric way of thinking exists atleast in the thoughts of Lewis Carrol and my thoughts do make some sense as compared to the thoughts of Alice (lets try to forget that she lives in Wonderland and I live in this incredible, mortal Humanland -on which wonderland is based hence making it a subset of my humanland!) There, I score Alice, atleast I dont cry to make a pond out of my own tears and I dont have to dry myself as instructed by the wise mouse who happens to be drowning in the same pond!
I have accomplished a number of feats thanks to this undying - ever increasing - regularly updated curiosity and a chain of thoughts which actually might be faster than the speed of sound ! (wait till I prove it and win The Nobel Prize in the near future) I remember walking faaaar ahead of my destination, lost in my own world of curiosity about what lies ahead. As a child I have tried to walk farther in the woods to see if there is any unexplored castle or some forgotten ruins waiting to be discovered by me. I even remember once spying on some squirrels in my backyard to find out which tree they live and who is whos who in the squirrel family. My curiosity has made me wake up early in the morning to find out which different species of birds chirp while I sleep - I remember getting ready and all set to leave for the village outskirts (some 5 minutes away from our Government Quarter) just to find the above mentioned birds and return home at about 9AM - famished after my adventure and smeared in dust :). I also remember accompanying my house-maid in the evening to the distant fields to hear the wolves howling .... those were the days!
Destiny plays a big role in keeping my curiosity alive . The "grown- up " version of me goes on roaming far and wide in order to explore this whole new city I now find myself in! I remember the first time I set foot on the city streets.... I used to roam around searching for short-cuts, new shops, new places to spend time (ironically, there was no time left to spend after all these excursions). .... And I am now so well versed with this city that I can take anyone out on a fully guided city tour on foot! And I can proudly put down here that we actually went on a trip to Moscow and saved a lot in one of the most expensive cities thanks to my curiosity. :)
..........So, thats about my curiosity so far (as far as I can put in human word format... if I decide to put down more.... it might just be some incomprehensible gibberish with neither head nor tail why, it might even lack the soul of thoughts)

V-DAY SPECIAL

Happy Valentines Day ! (In India its already the 15Th , but never mind, Der aaye durust aaye!)
Like all other (over-)enthusiastic young people, obviously I have lots to write.But sometimes thoughts run so fast in my head that I am left a bit disoriented and a lot more confused at the end of my thought process, which, sadly is left incomplete.So I didnt know exactly what I want to put down -though posting something was a must!.... and thats when I decide to finally post my own poem here which I composed some months back . I thankfully decided this before the V-day ends -which is a miracle in itself!
So fasten your heartbeats , here it comes........

vicharanchya athaang samudratna ,
ek don vichar tarangun ver aale;
ani smritipatalaanchya kinaryaver
don ek kshan sthiraavle....

raja-raani khelta khelta,
tuzyabarobar ghalavlele balpan aathavle.
lahanpani tujyabarobar khelnyasathi ,
aaishi kelele bhandan aathavle .

tu matrik pass zhalaas
mi aanandane vedich zhale!
mag tu mothe-mothe bhashaavaad aikavlet,
tevha maanya mala kahich nahi umajle-
pan tuzya husharine hruday bhedun takle!
ani maze mann abhimanane fugle!

mag ekda tula bhetayla ,
mi thodi ushira pohochle
tu ragavlyaver mi-
fakta khudkan hasle.
tuzya ragane fuglelya galana baghun...
tuzya kesanshi mi kinchit khelale,
ani rag visrun tulapan lagech hasu aale

ek-ek karun smrutinni sakhalich gumfali,
aani vartamanatun mala door khechun gheun geli!
achaanak!- mag tu mala haak marlis.
tya hakene mala kshanbhar bhaan ale-
pan doosryach kshani tuzya mithit shirun
mi aaplya bhavishyache swapna rangavu lagle.

- Mad (18/11/08)


Disclaimer: This is my poem, not my own story.

A letter to M.K.Gandhi

To,
Mr. M.K.Gandhi,
Father Of The Nation
[Republic (!) of India] ,
Seventh Heaven.

Dear Bapu,
Kem cho? I finally got your correct address! You don't know me, I am comparatively a new addition to your Nation. Well, let me leave my introduction short and sweet and come to the important point. I thought it to be my prime duty to inform you about the current events in the country.
Your nation is already in her sixties now.... And after you left her, they decided to place you in every government institution. So there you hang these days,looking aside and smiling away to glory when they lie, take bribes and practice violence ...if you could have looked straight!
And most days you hang there alone......
The "rajdhani" is doing great too, in par(lie)ment sessions politicians fight and swear and whole nation gets an opportunity to watch them... live!!!These days our "Leaders" have become modern, they travel in AC cars and aeroplanes , and most of the time they have to visit abroad ...for the nation!After all this nobody can blame them for not being able to give their 100% to the nation....after all they are humans not machines like you were!So what if they were not present in Mumbai when they were needed , some of them actually made it to the crime scene ......separately, and blamed the other at the moment of national crisis!-not to mention the manpower that was needed to protect them (from what they God only knows).
Speaking of Mumbai, now-a-days there are new opportunities coming up for the nations' youth.... new degree and diploma options are open for them....there is a Diploma of Social Nuisance (DSN) . I am sorry , forgot that you have absolutely no idea about all this and i have to let you know the details....So there are these new upcoming" leaders" like khaj- taak- re ,they have created many "Sena"s and recruited youth . These senas go on beating people for different reasons, one for example,based in Maharashtra believes in beating people from other states and people who cant speak Marathi; there is another sena that beats up girls !And youngsters can go abroad coz on that side of the border, they can study and get degree in Terrorism (DT)! You see people are free to do what they want to.
And people are free to write what they want to in newspapers, show what they want to on TV , watch what they want to .... young Indians try to sing and make people laugh, some try to dance ! Till now we had only Father of Nation, but now we also have "Indian Idol" (3 of them so far). And why should be Bharatiya nari left unmentioned?There is a Great Indian lady who makes wonderful serials and the rest of them watch it away to glory! Now we have so many Ba's!
-Oh, hows Ba by the way? Convey my regards to her. And I hope you have already forgiven Mr. Godse, for if you haven't, tomorrows the perfect chance(the day to give up hatred, we celebrate love- its called Valentines day) . You were right when you saw him (when he shot you) and said "hey Ram !'- he is really your Ram for having rescued you from this incredible place called India!
With all my love and regards,
Great-grand daughter of the nation.